2024 Reflection Part Two

Outside of sticking to the themes I set out for myself at the start of the year, I think I'd be remiss if I didn't reflect on all the other major things that happened in 2024, to include what I was able to check off from my Life List.

While the move to Texas largely feels like a detriment to my happiness, it was certainly the right decision for my career, as evidenced almost immediately. And call it fate or good fortune or what have you, but it was because I had changed my dating profile to the Fort Worth area that I met Sam. He was only planning to come to Texas for the solar eclipse, but had changed the location on his profile to Dallas. He was upfront that he lives in Sydney and would just be visiting, and I was suspicious of his intentions. We started messaging well before the eclipse, but it was our first video call that really won me over. We had been joking about how some people won't even drive 45 minutes for a date, but he was willing to take a 13 hour flight to see his potential love. 

 

We didn't meet up until a couple days before the eclipse. We had two dates that week, both went brilliantly. I continued to date locally for a while, at Sam's encouragement. But as time went on, I liked the local guys less and liked Sam more. We planned a trip to the UK together and before we could even go, he came back to Texas to spend a week with me. Then we met up in LA for an air show and Disneyland. And at the end of the year, I met him in Tasmania and am now on his home turf in Sydney. There have been many ups and downs with him. We are two smart, confident people from other sides of the planet coming at the relationship from two different perspectives. But what's allowed us to make it this far is our agreement to always speak our minds when things are bothering us and to be honest and transparent. We've worked through a lot of differences and those hard journeys have probably made us stronger than if we hadn't had those differences. Time will tell if he'll be my forever love, but having him in my life has allowed me to go on adventures I wouldn't have done solo and seen things I wouldn't have seen without his insistence. It's been a blast dating him, and I hope it continues.

When people ask about my move to Texas, I am honest that I am really not happy with it. Again, it was the right move for my career, the cost of living is cheaper so that's helpful financially, and it led me indirectly to Sam, and for all those things I am grateful. But I hate the humidity of DFW, especially in the summer when it just feels punishing to me. And while I'm getting better at navigating the confusing freeway exits, they still confound me regularly. Bugs are a huge problem for me, also. Outside, for sure, but even in my house there seems to be a new bug every day, often of a different variety, so it's not like I have an isolated infestation that can just be wiped out. It's ongoing and constant but always changing, and that's the most frustrating part. I joke that I figured out the best way to live with the Dallas summer - leaving altogether. My escape to Scotland and London with Sam was the best part of my summer.

In my career, I hit some low points both in 2023 and in 2024, feeling like I'm stagnating and that my efforts are in vain. My boss is sharp, though, and recognizing my struggles, has brought opportunities for me to get more engaged, one of which culminated in a two-week trip to Milan which was phenomenal. The prospect of going back, and/or going to Greece, Japan or Australia for work in 2025 has excited me, and with some fresh new superstar employees on my team, I have found some reinvigoration.

On one of our few recreational days in Italy, there was mural with Alice in Wonderland that translated to this:

"The secret, Alice, is to surround yourself with people who make your heart smile. It is then, and only then, that you will find Wonderland...."

I think that is true, including but not limited to finding fulfillment in my work.

Speaking of travel, this year's first time achievements from my Life List all required travel, most of which was with Sam in the UK. Here they are, what I completed from my Life List in 2024:

#7 See an aurora

In the same line of thinking about the swing dance events I thought I'd have to miss because of moving to Texas and the deciding to make them happen anyways, I had set my sights in going to see the Northern Lights in 2024. A major driving factor was that the Aurora was in its peak of an 11 year cycle, so the likelihood of seeing it was increased greatly. I had originally targeted a spring time trip but that proved a bit too cumbersome. So I went in early October, butting up against a previous booking in LA. I stayed at the Chena Hot Springs Resort which I thought may be a gimmicky tourist trap but ended up blowing my expectations out of the water (pun intended). The first night I was there I tried spotting Aurora on my own and saw nothing. Wanting to ensure the highest likelihood of success, I booked an Aurora tour the next day, and it did not disappoint! You can read more in my dedicated post about it, but suffice to say I saw a great display of the Northern Lights! Ironically, Sam and I missed seeing the Southern Lights in Tasmania by one day! The island got a spectacular display better than most anyone could remember the night of New Year's Day, and we had left just that day. Seeing the elusive Southern Lights may be the next thing I add to my list.

#17 Watch the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace

Sam and I had debates about what constituted completion of this item - we took a tour to the gates of Buckingham Palace and on that same tour we saw the changing of the guard at a different location. But the exact wording preventing my concurrence that this item was done. I booked that tour to be early in our time in London just in case it didn't scratch the itch, and that turned out to be good because then I was able to find a separate time to bear witness to the actual Buckingham Palace changing of the guards. I went alone while Sam met up with a friend. It was quite an event, but nothing I need to do again. Check!

#43 Ride on a red double decker bus in the UK 

The tour I booked did shuttle us around on a double decker, so this was an easy one to knock off. Fun, too, we had some great views of all of the major icons of the city.

#73 Look for the Loch Ness Monster Before going to London, Sam and I first met up in Inverness. We rented a car and Sam drove us around the beautiful highlands to our hotel situated right in the Loch Ness. We took a few short hikes down to the water and spent a couple days driving around the area, stopping at various scenic spots. We visited the Loch Ness gift shop and posed with the monster statues. It was such a a chill time it was one of my favorites with Sam.

#74 Go on the London Eye

Seeing a long queue, I searched on my phone and found that we could bypass the long wait for a small premium - well worth it - and Sam and I were zipped into the London Eye. We took some great shots up there and called it a day.

#127 See Stonehenge

The second part of the tour I booked was a coach bus ride out to Stonehenge. The downtime on the bus was nice - I may have dozed off and snored to the delight of nearby kids - and then the walk to and from the stones was perfectly pleasant. We took dozens of photos as I suppose most people do, and in some we got silly with it. It was really neat to see them and be moved by the spiritual air that seems to be there. I loved the quotes back at the visitor center, especially this one:

"One might almost suppose that it was specially designed to accommodate every notion that could possibly be projected onto it"

- John Michell, writer, 1981

Ending the year in Australia with Sam has meant the world to me. It was with a heavy heart that I kept my plans to come, however. I was intending to spend Christmas with most of my family in Tucson before coming. Knowing my oldest sister has just started chemotherapy, I wanted to be around to help her and her family out if needed, so I planned to fly out early and work remotely for a couple days. Then after Christmas, I'd leave for Australia and ring in the New Year with Sam.

The night before my flight to Tucson, my brother in law texted me that my sister was going to the hospital because she was in pain from a complication of the chemo. That morning, as I was getting ready to leave for the airport, she was given 24 hours to live and being rushed into emergency surgery that would likely kill her. There was nothing for me to do but get to the airport and make sure I made it to Tucson. My Dad picked me up from the airport and we went straight to the hospital. I was glad I was there in those first days. My sister performed miracle after miracle in beating the odds of surviving and recovering. 

Needless to say, I didn't get much work done, and I especially decided not to work when I learned that my sister was trying to communicate through sign language but nobody there could interpret. I was able to read most of her signing (she was heavily sedated so her signs weren't perfect and she was going very fast and spelling "creatively" - ipzza for pizza, for example). It was good timing for me to be there then. We celebrated Christmas with a small weight hanging in the air as she was never far from any of our thoughts. As she recovered, she was able to speak more. 

My other sister made plans to come. I felt like it made the most sense for me to keep my plans - she would want that for me, I certainly needed it mentally and emotionally, and we thought it might even alarm her if I cancelled and my other sister came - she may think we were lying about her positive prognosis. Still, she's been on my mind and I've been keeping up with her progress from texts from my family.

Meanwhile, Sam and I have had some much needed conversations and worked on how to be together better. I can tell he really cares for me and is really trying to be what I want. He is always thinking of me and my needs, and assumes responsibility for the literal heavy lifting and the like. He has been very caring and supportive regarding my sister, and otherwise we've had good fun and made some great memories.

I'm treating my time in Sydney, especially while he works during the week, as a mini sabbatical to somewhat make up for the sabbatical I didn't get to take after closing the plant in Florida. It's been very refreshing, mentally and physically. I came here with aggravated asthma from the smog of Milan, and the clean air of Tasmania and the ocean air here in Sydney have done wonders for my ability to breathe. I'm far from 100% better but much improved over a week ago. And while I'm still getting used to my CPAP, I think it's introduction into my life will give my health a chance of finally going in the right direction in 2025. A quote I've found here in Darling Harbor fits my state of mind well.

It speaks of, "...a sea that harbours anger in a pounding mid-year storm. Yet a sea that offers comfort when the weather's clear and warm, Where the whitecaps сrown an оcean that is every shade of blue, Crashing to a golden shore, that's Australia through and through." - Murray Hartin, 1997