You Nailed It

This has been pressing on my mind lately, and tomorrow is National Do Something Nice Day, so I thought it was a good time to bring it up.  I have recently (read: in the last 6 months) been personally reminded in the most impressive ways of the power of compliments.  

My first example is from when a swing dancer I respect a TON went out of his way to tell me how much he enjoys watching my facials when I perform. I don't recall his exact words, but it was something along the lines of, "Whenever I see you guys perform, I always watch your facials because you nail them every time."  This was really special to me because (1) I realize I'm not the best dancer on the floor, not nearly, so I felt like I was contributing to the performance, (2) I work hard at performing with my face and not just moving through the steps, so it was validation and encouragement to keep it up, and (3) he sought me out and pointed out something specific that he liked, which meant he put thought into it and made it that much more meaningful to me.  So often after I perform, people say, "Great job," and I am grateful for general compliments like that, but I think specific compliments show genuine appreciation and are more constructive for the future.  

We're working on a version of "Thriller" right now (performing at Hepkats on the 31st, I would love for all of you to come watch it), and as we work on it, I can't help but feel a deep need to perfect the facials (scary, spooky zombie faces instead of my normal cheery, smiley, sometimes sassy faces), primarily because this one well-respected dancer told me that he loves watching my facials.  He likely will not even be at the Thriller performance, but I feel obligated to nail them anyways, to not let myself down, which drives me to work harder at them (I've been watching the video and studying the facials and practicing them no matter how silly I feel).  All because of one compliment.  I don't want to call him out, but if he's reading this (and I hope he is, so he knows how grateful I am), he knows who he is.

My second example is from just last week.  As many of you know, I had gone shopping and found a great green dress (green - when have I ever looked good in green?) and posted a picture of it.  I spent the rest of my evening reading and disconnected from facebook, until suddenly I checked it and saw that I had a bajillion compliments!  Guys, THANK YOU SO MUCH!  It was an amazing response and really boosted my confidence.  I assure you, it really was the dress!  I wore that dress to work on Thursday, and virtually every conversation started with, "Hold on, let me see this dress."  It was really amazing for my confidence, especially because I've only recently started wearing dresses (and the occasional jumpsuit - another highly complimented piece) to work, and I hate my legs and I am self-conscious about my weight and all that other stuff.  So the compliments from that dress alone made me want to wear more dresses and focus on my appearance more than I have in the past (previously, it was: throw a shirt on with a pair of pants and find a decent necklace and get out the door). Guess what?  I got four new dresses!  My closet is becoming packed with dresses for work, despite not wearing dresses to work for the previous 10 years of my career!

I will be the first to admit that I have to work at this complimenting thing; it is not easy for me (I think I'm probably pretty selfish naturally), so I have to remind myself to look for things I like about people.  "That shirt is really flattering on you," or "That necklace goes perfect with that outfit," or "That color looks great on you," are easy enough.  I also try to let people know when I think they're doing or have done a good job handling a difficult situation.  I don't force myself to compliment all the time, because I don't want it to seem forced or contrived, but I do try to verbalize it when someone makes an impression on me.  I think all too often we keep these things bottled up or we forget to say them, and all those people are missing out on hearing from us and the amazing feedback that can lift someone's spirits or improve their attitude towards something.  The best thing about compliments is that they are free to give, take very little time or effort, and can have such a big payout.  

So for tomorrow, my challenge for everyone, including myself, is to give someone a sincere and specific compliment, preferably in person, but online if circumstances are prohibitive to in-person chatting.  

Back to the Future: A Sneak Peek at 2045

There is a big difference between following current trajectories into the future to imagine a dismal fate, and believing that the small efforts today can turn those trends around.  Maybe its the hopeful optimist in me, or maybe its my faith in humanity's ability to prevent foreseeable disasters, but I believe 30 years from today will be an awesome time to live.  There are three areas that I'm most anxious to fast-forward to: technology, health and the economy.

Self-driving cars will be practically mandated; it won't contravene hard law to drive oneself, but it will be rendered completely impractical and economically challenging because insurance rates will skyrocket for non-autonomous vehicles.  A new industry will arise around furnishing and "pimping" your self-driving car, free from the restrictions of forward-facing seats and the tethers of strict safety features.  Cars will morph into lounges of productivity, comfort and service, while zooming along safer roads than ever seen in the history of the car. 

Programming will be taught in schools instead of cursive.  Some will excel at it and become programmers, but most people will know basic computer languages. 

3D printing as a technology will mature into a mass production tool for specific applications, such as wearable technologies, on-the-go sound equipment and hot-off-the-printer food delivery services.  Most middle-class people will have some sort of 3D scanner at home, with many also having a 3D printer for specific housekeeping requirements. 

Speaking of housekeeping, robots will be employed in most homes to do the mundane work - washing and putting away dishes and clothes, taking out the garbage and recycling, vacuuming and cleaning surfaces. 

Wearables will be as pervasive as cellphones are today, and will become more invasive as we get accustomed to the Internet of Things.  These technologies will drive the turnaround of the obesity epidemic, bringing diabetes, asthma, IBS, heart disease, allergies and even cancer to their knees.  Your device will inform you that you are low on a specific nutrient and will select recommendations from your list of favorite foods as well as new dishes to try at local restaurants to satisfy your dietary requirements.  Restaurants will have no choice but to offer tasty, healthful options to win and retain customers.  Your device will also walk you through your grocery store identifying products that you may enjoy based on your tastes and dietary needs, avoiding those that you have a habit of over-indulging on.  Health and weight loss will no longer be a pressing matter, as it will be so effortless to stay healthy that obesity will seem like a frivolous concept, and all the diseases that are correlated with poor dieting will seem foreign. 

The economy will accelerate like never before, primarily because we will have long since done away with partisan politics and replaced the political system with an issues-based and performance-driven model. Flourishing in this economy is as simple as getting paid fairly for what you excel at, enjoy doing or what you are learning.  The increased transparency of skills, qualifications and talent compared to relative salaries in every field will make it nearly impossible to be under- or over-paid.  There will be more part-time and flex-time jobs and the development of hybrid jobs - where you spend part of your time in one function, and the rest of your time on another function - to best make use of the skills and value each person brings to an organization.  With job satisfaction and productivity up, and economic uncertainty diminished, the finance will be a no-brainer.  The work week will be shorter, providing us more time to exercise and participate in activities that keep us healthy. 

These are the things that I see as inevitable, if not a slightly optimistic or accelerated view of 30 years from today.  The future is ours to invent, and if we don't invent it, someone else will.  Deciding what aspect of the future to be a part of making is an ongoing challenge for me, but its the right way to think for any company or individual wanting to be around and see these things come to fruition in 30 years.